I live in a place called Halifax (like the bank). In general terms it’s a pretty shit
town, devoid of any kind of “scene” and bypassed completely by the cool
gene. If Halifax was a kid, it would be the ugly, boring, simple-minded, slightly scary one in the corner with no friends. In order to debunk northern stereotypes I decided to get a bunch of mates together and see if it
was at all possible to have a good night out in a shit town. Here’s
what I found …

The first
thing you notice when going out in Halifax is the attention to
security. Local pub landlords want us to feel totally safe when we’re enjoying a night on the town, which is why most cubicle doors
have two locks on them.

It’s still socially acceptable to be seen drinking beverages such as WKD in
Halifax and not be at a youth club. Even though it’s a shit town, everybody is happy – even the local Emo kids.

Halifax is a great town for singles. You can get so drunk that
you spill half your Malibu and coke down your top, but rest easy that
somewhere in some pub there’ll be a guy who’s even more wasted than
you and will shag you silly and be grateful for it.

Despite what loads of southerners might think, Halifax is dead trendy
– Sheila’s mates all think she looks just like that model Angus
summat-or-other …

Halifax is twinned with a town in Germany called Aachen. Locals like
nothing more than to embrace all things continental. On a warm summer’s
evening the chippies and kebab shops get so full that punters
spill out onto the streets to enjoy their fish suppers in piss-soaked
doorways.

All in all, it just goes to prove that you can have a good night out even in a shit town (given enough booze).

HANNAH