The first day of university is a thrilling moment in your life. You
leap into your new room full of excitement, with great plans to make
this 8 by 6 foot cubby hole adequately portray your amazing
personality. So everyone who comes in is totally immersed in what
you’re all about. Then all your dreams are shattered by the
unflinchingly ugly, stark, utilitarian fittings and the grey-blue walls
of your new home. And then you panic. And do you know what a panicking
student does when it sees its new room? It fucks up and goes to the
poster sale and buys a small forest’s worth of mind-bendingly clichéd
posters. Here is a quick guide of what not to buy, skimmed from our recent Student Guide VI.