Looking for ways to keep your relationship healthy, stable, and full of lasting love? Angelika Koch, a relationships and breakup expert at dating app Taimi, identified six key habits to practice as a couple. Here’s how to keep the spark alive and the intimacy protected.

1. Respond To Bids For Connection

Maintaining intimacy is all about the small things. For example, making your partner a cup of coffee in the morning or humoring them by watching the 20+ TikToks they sent you can go a long way.

“Making it a priority to respond to bids of connection and attention shows the person you’re with that they matter,” Koch said. “It keeps the relationship strong over the years.”

2. Handle Conflict With Respect and Compassion

It doesn’t matter how gently you might love someone—if you fight with disrespect and hostility, you’ll kill all the safety and intimacy you once cultivated together.

“It’s important never to call your partner names or intentionally harm them,” Koch said. “Conflict should be about both of you working through the problem together, not acting like you’re on opposing teams.”

Arguments and disagreements will happen, but they don’t need to (and never should) turn into full-blown aggressive fights.

3. Keep Putting in Effort 

Many daters get caught up in the early stages of a relationship, going above and beyond for their partner. While this isn’t inherently bad, you might be setting an unsustainable standard within your connection. Consistent effort is far more romantic and genuine than short-lived “princess” or “prince” treatment.

“Effort should never fade as comfort grows,” Koch said. “Keeping the same level of care and attention you had in the honeymoon stage is essential for a relationship to thrive.”

If you notice yourself or your partner become complacent in your relationship, it’s time for an honest conversation. Especially in long-term relationships, priorities can shift without us even realizing. Oftentimes, all it takes is a candid discussion.

4. Be Consistent With Your Words and Actions

A lack of consistency can create a major disconnect in relationships. If you want to cultivate a strong and healthy foundation with your partner, it’s important to follow-through on your promises and continue to show up for them—and vice versa.

“Consistency builds a secure foundation where each person knows they can rely on their partner,” Koch explained. “Relationships only thrive with continued nurturing.”

5. Understand and Speak in Each Other’s Love Languages

We all give and receive love differently. While you might feel most adored when your partner buys you thoughtful gifts, they might feel most loved when you give them words of affirmation. Neither is right or wrong, but take the time to understand one another’s preferences so you can better express your love and connect more deeply.

“Successful couples love their partner the way their partner best feels loved—and see dissatisfaction not as criticism but as an opportunity for growth,” Koch said.

6. Prioritize a Friendship Above All Else

You might be thinking…why would I want to see my partner as a friend? But if you can’t treat your significant other with as much love and adoration as you do your friends, then the foundation is already shaky. 

“A foundation of friendship gives the greatest chance of success and a positive future,” Koch said.

Your partner doesn’t have to be your best friend, but at the very least, you should have a solid friendship at the core of your relationship. They should feel like someone you can trust with your thoughts and feelings—a person you feel safe with, who supports your dreams and helps you to shine as your authentic self.